A maid of honor and best man (stock image).Photo:Wirestock/Getty
Wirestock/Getty
A man is opening up about his decision to turn down his niece’s request to serve asbest manin her upcoming wedding because he would have to enter on the arm of his ex-wife.
His niece, however, has remained particularly close with his ex-wife, who has always “treated her like a daughter.” At one point, she even encouraged her uncle to forgive his then-spouse and stay in the marriage. Ultimately, the man chose to move on and was able to “gradually rebuild” his life, eventually finding love with a new partner.
Four months ago, the man received an invitation to his niece’s wedding and he immediately accepted. But his niece later expressed her wish that he serve as her best man and his ex-wife as her maid of honor.
Upset bride (stock image).tonefotografia/Getty
tonefotografia/Getty
“I was shocked,” he recalled of his reaction, “and I made a point of firmly saying that I could not accept the invitation and that if [my ex] was a bridesmaid I would not go to the wedding and much less enter together.”
“She got upset and broke down crying, and now my family is telling me that I’m being too hard and that I should do this for the sake of my niece,” he continued.
As for his current partner, he said she gave her blessing to the wedding arrangements, telling him “it would be okay” for him to participate in the ceremony alongside his ex-wife.
“But I don’t think it’s fair,” he insisted, asking fellow Redditors, “Am I an idiot?”
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A bride and groom (stock image).JovanaT/Getty
JovanaT/Getty
“You two have been broken up for 4 years — your niece needs to accept that,” someone else said. “She can have a close relationship with your ex, but she doesn’t have the right to impose that on you. Asking you both to attend and be civil is one thing, but to ask you to enter together, sit together or interact in any way is too much.”
Some commenters went so far as to suggest that the niece could be “using her wedding as a manipulative tool” and trying to pull aParent Trap-style scenario.
“You need to make it crystal clear you and your ex will NEVER be getting back together, like ever! She seems to be trying to parent trap you both in an attempt for you to reconcile. You need to be firm with her,” one person advised.
Others, while sympathizing with the man’s discomfort over the idea of walking with his ex — “especially given the context” of their breakup — urged him not to skip the wedding.
“Your niece might have been thoughtless about this particular situation, but you should still be there for her on her day,” one person wrote.
Another chimed in: “I would still attend the wedding. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with going as a guest for support. But just stay away from your ex. You have moved on and should be able to be civil so you can go support your niece.”
source: people.com
